There is something magnificent about have portions of myself preserved in the form of alters. There is always someone in my head doing something funny or silly. My alters really do have a mind of their own and because they are children they are completely genuine.
Recently I got an iPad for school purposes but I realized that my iPad has become such a great tool in regards to internal communication. Most of my young alters do not know how to read, a few do know how to read but the majority do not.
Many of my alters have thick dissociative walls that do not allow them to communicate. This poses as huge problem because many of my alters have similar memories as well as fears. This is where the iPad comes in- my alters write (speak) notes to each other. When the recipient of the note comes out my iPad can read the note to them which eliminated the problem of many alters not being able to read.
Within the past two years I have had a problem of my alters drawing on the walls. My alters are little creative beings and many of them have come to love color. The majority of my life I have been colorblind without even knowing.
You may be asking yourself how you live life not knowing you were colorblind but it is the same reason that I lived life not realizing I was multiple both were my normal.
My colorblindness became evident during high school because it was the first time that I began wearing my own clothes as opposed to a uniform in elementary and middle school. I attended a private middle school that required me to wear a uniform, which only exacerbated the rigidity during my childhood, but I will have to elaborate on that topic in another post.
My life in color is exponentially better so my alters have an obsession with coloring. It is great and it has taken me such a long time to convince them that crayons are simply colored wax. My alters were very concerned that they were going to be punished if they decided that they enjoyed coloring or anything that was not cult related.
The first time that I my little buddy C decided that, she wanted to experience life in color I discovered that my tongue was rainbow colored. My little buddy C is an interesting person, she tastes the world because C tends to lick everything. Bribery has helped C to somewhat understand that licking objects is not socially acceptable and it can cause everyone inside my body to become sick because C is essentially putting germs directly into my body. Nevertheless, even though my tongue was multicolored because my little buddy C licked markers, it was progress.