I have a secret life that most people do not know about. At any given moment I have tons of things and people talking in my head. I get to color and eat sugary cereal everyday.
I have constant entertainment in my inner world. I need less sleep than the average person. I (we) are never going to have to grow up if we don’t want to.
Some define my secret life as a disorder but I don’t. Being a multiple isn’t what the media portrays in the movies. I always have been and always will be a multiple because I adapted to my real secret world. But being a multiple in my eyes is just me. I am a person that is unlike anyone else and for once it’s actually a good thing.
I am realizing that I’m pretty “normal”. My multiplicity protected my exsistance and allowed me stay alive.
I hope that the people who don’t believe in DID understand that I have never had a choice to believe – everything was forced upon me even as a small infant.
I am a functional member of society and I do most of the right things. I will never harm anyone, I would be more likely to harm myself. There is a lot of stigma against my disorder which is why I don’t speak out, even when people who are close to me doubt DID.
They doubt DID because they can’t possibly think that another person could harm a person to the point of dehumanization. But the truth is, if this person knew about my secret life they would believe in DID. They would be able to see that I push myself to my limits so that I can be functional.
I believe in DID because I lived my childhood in a cage, had I unwanted sexual relations and saw things that no one should. I know that true evil exists in the world because I looked in to his eyes. I saw and I forgave. I forgave, unforgivable things because I think I deserve a chance. I wonder if this person read this they would think about their judgements- I will never know but I know that DID is real because it’s my life, my exsistance and the reason that I am still alive.