Life is so utterly complicated. The world consists of so many unknown things. With this said I want to add that my life no longer consists of everyday chaos. I am on winter break right now and I have much more free time. I have been reflecting on the past year actually the last 3 years.
It all happens so fast- life. I put a lot of pressure on my self and I want to be perfect but 3 years ago I was still fighting the process and life itself. Many doctors that interacted with me suggested long term hospitalization because I was that sick. I think at that point I had given up too. I didn’t ever think I would have a future or a life.
But today and everyday I have both of those things. I strive for perfection and put a lot of pressure on myself. Success feels so great and now that I can actually feel the positive energy from my successes it makes me want it even more. The problem with this is that I feel a lot of unneeded stress. And that causes me to feel overwhelmed when I shouldn’t.