In mere days, my life is going to change for the better. I have waited for this moment to arrive for as long as I can remember. The independence that I have desperately longed for is just days away.
Many times, I tried to imagine what it is going to feel like to finally be away from some of the physical reminders of my past. I imagined that I would be afraid of the unknown and weary. But right now its nothing like that- it is more of I wanted to move yesterday and I don’t care what I bring with me. I’m not saying that I’m not overwhelmed by mile long list of things that need to be done in the new few days because I totally am.
But one thing that is just so different for me is that I’m not thinking about things on a long term basis. I’m not making plans or commitments because I want this time to be just about me. I am finally at a place where I can solely focus on myself.
I am moving to an academic environment that is full of opportunity and discovery of so many amazing things. Everything about it just feels right. It is a somewhat unexplainable feeling to “just know”- and I do just enjoy “just knowing”.
I have been to a few events at the university and my fellow classmates in the program I am in have a level of empathy that I can feel when I enter the room. It is almost as if they just know how hard life can be for some people. That is a feeling that has driven me to be passionate student. That passion is what has helped me get this far when the world turned its back.
There were so many times along this journey that I did not know what to do or how to even express my needs. Now my life is different and in mere days, my beautiful life will begin.