I have been on vacation for the past week and it has been so fun and rejuvenating. I got to do many things that I never got to do as a child. And I got to share all of those moments with my younger cousins.
But vacation is almost over and I am feeling this familiar feeling that I hated as a child. I have to leave a safe relaxing place and go back to a chaotic environment. I know that it will only be about a month before I move away to college so it will help me.
I was apprehensive going on this vacation because I wasn’t sure how my alters were going to do without being in “their room” but actually there was not too much internal chaos. Even on the days where we did have issues other alters came front to balance out for the lack.
Right now I’m sitting on the balcony of the resort listening to the ocean waves crash against the sand and I am at peace. And yeah, my alters are still yelling and crying ect but there is somewhat of a balance. A balance of self that I never realized before.
I noticed the other day when I was running that I forget to breathe. I found it so metaphorical to my current life because lately I do forget to breathe. Its nice to just take in the scenery and notice how far I have come on this journey.