I do not dream.
I used to have nightmares everyday but recently I do not have any. This is something I am NOT complaining about. Nevertheless, I do not have dreams.
I used to have these peculiar dreams during childhood, which I understand now.
I wish I did dream so I knew I was actually sleeping. Not having dreams is something I did not think of until the other day.
My psych professor always tells the class about his dreams and of course, he analyses them. I am frustrated because I want to analyze my dreams.
I wonder if not dreaming is a sign that my life is hopeless. A sign that everyone has given up.
I wish I knew the answers or even the questions to ask…but I do not. Instead, I stay in stuck in this dreamless unpromising existence.
My internal system works against me and tries to sabotage anything and everything I have worked so hard to achieve. I do not get this. What is the point of doing that? I think that is a rhetorical question.
I wish I did not need things. I never call my therapist when I need her even though she tells me I can. I wish I did not need to touch anyone, I wish I did not need love.
I wish I were not human. I wish I could just live the life that I should be living. I wish I could be an adult in their 20s going out with friends and being social as I am supposed to be.
I wish I could appreciate what I have because many people in the world have it worse than me.