Nine years ago, when my Godmother died I thought my life was over.
As she was the only one who truly loved me. I could no longer escape to her house and just be myself. For so long I did not feel accepted by anyone else.
Without her, there was a void in my life & a huge hole in my heart that could never be filled.
However, something wonderful and unexpected happened. My first little cousin aka “my little monster” was born. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, so innocent and just perfect. From the first time I looked at him, I knew he was so special.
After I saw the baby, I went to my Godmother’s grave and talked to her. I told her that this sweet boy is so special to me. And, that I want to give him the same kind of “good specialness” that she gave me as a child.
I am not religious per se, but I think I have some type of spirituality in my life. With that said, as I was driving home, I saw the most beautiful sunset I had ever seen. I knew it had to be a sign.
The baby who is no longer a baby is now seven years old. He is the oldest monster out of the three boys. They are all growing up so fast. In addition, becoming the most caring and sweet boys I have ever known.
We have our “good special” days almost every week.
Sometimes I just think about them and tears of happiness come. I just love watching them grow up safe. I am so thankful to have these three boys in my life. They are the child that I never was so free and innocent.
I never knew I could love someone so much. These three boys have totally captured my heart.