Feeling safe is very important to me right now.
It is that warm, secure feeling. Safe can mean that one many need to control their environment. Safe can be a person or an object. Nevertheless, the definition varies individually, as it can depend on many things.
However, ones definition of safe can be just being alone and keeping everyone at an arms length. If one cannot seem to find safety anyway else except isolation it may be the only option. It can be common to also find very small spaces safe. Many individuals may sit in closets, corners, under beds and behind furniture.
Being alone to an extent may be beneficial. It may give the individual time to collect oneself and figure out ones “next move”.
Nevertheless, the true question is why might isolation feel safe?
It can be a possible feeling flashback from childhood. When a childhood is filled with abusive situations, it may be difficult to find that safe feeling. The child’s only safe place may be just being by itself. No one will be able to hurt the child. Even the isolation of abuse may help the child to be safe.
Nevertheless, for others being alone may be a very different experience. Alone for then could mean that they actually had or have to feel feelings. Also a feeling flashback from childhood. As they put on a facade when they were around others being alone for them could mean that they feel sadness and pain. All those feelings that one may actually be trying to avoid may come out when they are alone.
It is a very interesting topic to explore for me, as I do not know which idea of safety I claim as mine. In addition, I may be able to feel both at different times and also at the same time. I think that I why I am finding it so hard to figure out what my idea of safety. To others my idea of safety seems “abnormal” but to me it is perfectly normal.
Someone told me this once and I always remember it. My “normal” may be other peoples “crazy”. I think that it is okay for that to be the case. Because my childhood was not “normal” but my reaction to trauma is said to be “normal”. My adaptation of PTSD is a normal reaction to an abnormal situation. Therefore, I possibly may not be so “crazy” after all :)