Families are supposed to protect each other. However, sometimes, they do not. Sometimes families do not do what they are supposed to do and that means someone gets hurt.

Abuse is part of a bigger picture. Abuse is all about secrets. Covering up, being told to shut up, and portraying the image of the “perfect” family.

When I eventually decide to accept the abuse, I will also be accepting that “my” family is part of it. The abuse did not happen solely because of me. “My” family helped enable my abusers. The people that fractured life also provided the abusers with the means.

My family system is based on a secret, lie, and an image.


2 thoughts on “Enablers

  1. Unknowingly, my family put me in the clutches of a pedophile – for about 3 years. Now that they know, they have blame me. I was willing to stand up and take all responsibility for everything and they still hate me. I was 9 years old. Secrets are so ugly.

  2. Ivory,

    Secrets are so ugly. I feel that my secret has changed my life both good and bad. When I blame myself for not telling, I look at a normal child at the same age I was.

    I realize that I couldn’t have done anything. But 9 year olds can’t drive or have jobs yet so you shouln’t get blamed. It is supposed to be the families job to protect their children. They didn’t do their job and we get blamed I find that unfair and irresponsible.

    Thanks for commenting.Take Care. Be Well.


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