At this very point in time i’m dealing with a difficult decision to make. To try medication again or stay med free. If you don’t know I have DID, PTSD & MDD.
Medicating a multiple can be difficult because there are many factors that you have to consiter. I read this article written by a former therapist and she said that only some parts need certain medications. And thats very true because not everyone in your system is depressed. Every alters body chemistry can also be differnt.
At my first hospitalized so they started me on an antidepressant. I was fine with that. But then my symptoms got way worse, like flashbacks and stuff. So my day program at the time gave me more meds to help me. Before I knew I was taking like nine differnt medicine. It’s not like the drs didn’t try but they just didn’t know what to do with me. I have what they call severe abreactions but I think they are just normal flashbacks but I’m not a dr yet.
But my so called abreactions used to last for hours. When they would last too long I guess after the first hour. They would give me an injection or an IM. The usual coctail of Ativan, haldol, cogentine. I really didn’t like it because if you know IM’s are usually injected in your buttock. So for anyone that uncomfortable. For a trauma survivor it’s really bad. I’m not going to explain but I think you get it.
So meds are a real turn off for me because of that. About six months ago I decided to stop taking all and any type of medications. At first I felt really good but now I don’t feel that great. But I don’t think that DID has to be treated with medication. I’m not saying stop taking your meds because thats dangerous. But i’m saying you might be able do it without meds just for everyone to think about. It’s all about the symptom managment.My primary therapist thinks that I might find it helpful to talk to a psychiatrist and see if I they can find something to take the edge off.
Don’t get me wrong at times I wish I had a prn to take. But at this moment I don’t. Not everyone inside wants to take medication again especially the littles, I understand their reasoning. One little told me that they are just trying to tell their story (through flashbacks) and all the drs and just making them go to sleep. Sleep is a scary and confusing thing for everyone in my system.
So I end this discussion for right now but it is no way over for me. I wish my insiders could just agree..I wish that alot. I think thats common for most multiples though.